Kids, TV, and Good Vs. Evil
Hearing Jade say, in the powerful theatrics that comes so naturally to three-year-olds, “And she will prick her finger on the spinning wheel and DIE!” incited a little revelation for me today about my concerns with television and movies–especially those made for kids.
Of course I have the obvious concerns about TV and overstimulation (and plausible contribution to learning disorders such as ADHD), it’s mind-numbing and imagination-depleting properties, and especially consumerism and commercialism. (Putting a child in front of a particular show once a week is one thing, having the characters of that show appear all over my kid’s world–employed to sell everything from potty seats to cereal to tennis shoes–is another!)
But after Jade’s spontaneous, practically out-of-nowhere recitation (she’s only seen Sleeping Beauty once, and it was months ago), I recognized another source of my unease over putting my kids in front of programs specifically targeted at the younger audience, and that is that good and evil are exaggerated in an extremely unrealistic way.
I am not in any way a moral relativist and I absolutely believe in Right and Wrong, but in real life–at least, the real world most of our children inhabit–people are not either Perfectly Good or Pure Evil. In real life, a friend might grab a toy away from you, a parent might get angry and yell once in a while, or a sister might draw on your favorite nightgown with permanent marker, AND all of those people are still basically good–with the natural human hang-ups we all have.
I don’t know how I feel about letting movies instill in my children this idea that there are two types of people: You’re either a “Good Guy” or a “Bad Guy.” Of course, in Christianity this is basically true–there are the repentant and the unrepentant–but in life this plays out in a much more subtle level than is ever portrayed on TV.
Then again, I suppose we have the same basic scenario in fairy tales and plenty of other children’s books. To be honest, I’ve felt slightly uncomfortable at times reading books like this to my kids for the very same reasons. It’s just much more apparent, much more dramatic on a moving screen. (Also, there are plenty of books that are more representational of good vs. evil in the world as it actually is–I am currently loving C.S. Lewis for this reason–while in movies this is very rare.)
I guess the reasons for my discomfort are still rather vague and ambiguous in my own head, so I’m probably not going to be able to portray it very well in writing, but I think my problem lies more with the unrealistic portrayal of good versus evil.
Not that I think anyone relies on television to teach their children morality, but if we let them watch it, well, they’re definitely learning from it. And if a child has just, say, Disney, to go on, he’s liable to come away thinking as long as he’s not in alliance with any fire-breathing dragons, he must be on the right track!
We want our kids to be able to recognize evil in the subtle forms in which it exists in real life–and not expect every trap of the devil to be promoted by someone wearing a black cloak or emitting a sinister cackle.
I’m not saying the occasional Disney flick is going to cause any harm (my kids have seen many of them, and heck, I grew up on them!), but worry over promoting a twisted view of reality is definitely among my anxieties when it comes to putting my kids in front of a movie.
grannie
so…do I send some videos, like Babe. Do you have a video cassett player? I’m trying to downsize. Help!
stephanie
My big beef with TV and small children is the intense commercialization. That’s why we ditched our TV and haven’t looked back. (although we do borrow an occassional movie from the library)
I think that seeing things in black and white, good vs. bad is normal thinking for small kids, even if they never watched TV or movies or heard of fairytales. There’s a lot in this world for them to make sense of and good v. evil is a simple place to start. I’m pretty sure that a more nuanced and understanding world view comes with growing up. (with the help of thoughtful parents, of course)
Simply Mother
I know you’re right Stephanie, and I do use stories like this as an opportunity to raise questions and get them thinking about right and wrong, what makes someone good/bad, etc., and it’s very interesting to see how they make sense of these things.
I agree the commercialization is probably my biggest concern too–J’s little out-of-nowhere dramatic moment just got me thinking about this. But yeah, I know how much companies spend on advertising, and they willingly do it because it works so well–even for adults. I hate to imagine how it affects my little children.
Nat2
Once in a while when I hear my kids talking about bad guys I will throw in, “There are no bad guys.” (I guess on the level they’re talking about anyway.) But I guess it isn’t useful to try to change that viewpoint, especially when struck by the wisdom of Stephanie’s comment. And I guess they can just struggle out of their skewed polarized view of the world when they’re grown up, like I’m doing.
I recently noted how the one guy approached Jesus with “Good master, how can I blah blah?” And Jesus said, “Why are you calling me good? No one’s good except my father in heaven.” That seems kind of a dichotomy!
But it relieves me from the stress of trying to be good, because it’s impossible anyway. Now I can just concentrate on the journey instead of fretting about how I’m not at the destination yet.