Simply Mother

If you are on Twitter (and maybe even if not), I’m sure you’re quite tired of hearing me whine about my pathetic relationship with foods containing a certain white substance. Please feel free to make use of that little red X in the upper right hand corner of your screen now, as this post is sure to be more of the same.

Back in June I tried a little experiment to see if I could go to without sugar for 21 days. I made it seven.

I use sweets to calm down, to feel better, to regain focus, to get motivated to clean or attempt other daunting tasks. Hourly, I rummage through the kitchen for something sweet. Nightly, I binge on whatever sugary treat we have in stock–or go through the trouble of baking up the next batch. And then binge.

Clearly, my problem is massive.

Yesterday, I started reading Potatoes, Not Prozac and becoming convinced that sugar is really, really bad for me.

This morning I ate a cinnamon roll (which Matt from made–from scratch–for the company we had last night) and shakily determined not to have any more sweets for the rest of the day. I wasn’t very far into the book, but I figured if I’m going to do it eventually, I might as well start cutting back now.

Then tonight, listening to the cookies and cinnamon rolls calling out to me from the kitchen, I read the part where Dasmaisons recommends keeping a food journal for starters. As soon as I read, “Just record what you eat and how you feel–don’t worry about changing your eating patterns just yet,” you know I put that book right down and ran straight off to the kitchen for the warm solace of chocolate chip cookies. And a cinnamon roll.

I’ve got my work cut out for me, but . . . I’m going to do this. I need to. For my children if nothing else. I don’t need to pass on my addictive habits. I certainly don’t need to be filling Carrie’s little baby body full of all this sugar. Reading about how the sugar is wreaking havoc on my brain–and the neurotransmitters involved in depression, anxiety, self-esteem, and the basic abilities to function like a non-psychotic person? Pretty convincing.

And she’s adamant that her program works. I’m all for it. Especially because I get to spend a whole ‘nother week enjoying my sweets to their fullest without making any changes. Just documenting. That, I can do. Not that anyone cares, but I’ll try to keep this updated.

Filed in: health • self-reflection | August 10, 2009