Simply Mother

I’ve been meaning to write about this development for several months. Sarah is reading.

Seriously reading. That is Anne of Green Gables she is pouring through right there, and I have no idea how it happened. Like everything else, she did this on her own.

I tried to teach. Well, sort of. A year ago when she started recognizing small words and interrupting me while I was reading to her to say them, I thought, “Hey, she’s interested in figuring out this reading business, I can help her out!”

So once or twice I tried explaining how it works. You know, every letter makes a certain sound, and you [generally] say them in the order they appear. Simple, right?

But no. This is as much as I ever even attempted to teach and I never got very far into it because as I was speaking I would look at her face and it would be all confused and I’d realize she wasn’t making sense of anything I was saying so I’d stop, naturally–what’s the point of teaching an unreceptive audience? (No matter how fabulously prepared the lesson might be!)

I realized that, as a four-year-old, her mind was inexplicably different from mine. So even though I thought I had it broken down in a very simple way, it wasn’t helpful because it didn’t make sense with the way she saw things.

Even now at almost 6 and reading and figuring out new words on her own, I wonder if I were to try to give my explanation to her, if she would comprehend it the way I intend. Children just don’t think about things the same way adults do, so often our “perfect” explanations just don’t send the message we think we’re sending.

It’s okay though, because kids eventually figure things out for themselves–sometimes with, sometimes without our help. Probably some do better with more adult direct instruction than others.

This one almost seems to be hindered by it. (Hard as that is to accept, because, man! I do love to be all authoritative and knowledgeable and stuff.)

For what it’s worth, I’ll share my approach with Sarah. I know there are so many different teaching methods and I truly believe kids can learn in a variety of ways, and each parent or teacher will adapt her methods to suit the personalities of herself and her child.

But for Sarah, I have not “taught” reading in any traditional sense of the word.

I introduced her to good books. I read books myself. I read books to her. I let her interrupt and start reading at her whim, and let her stop whenever she wanted to.

I readily answer her questions when they come (and there are few–she really prefers to figure things out herself.) But when they do come, I make sure to give her a straight answer (none of the, “Have you tried sounding it out” or “Did you look in the dictionary?” business that would almost positively result in her never asking me another question again, that’s just how she is.)

Generally, I don’t help unless help is requested. I let her pronounce words wrong and continue reading and enjoying the book, unless she seems to be asking for the correct pronunciation (which she is doing more now, as she gains more confidence in reading). I love watching as she figures things out and corrects herself as the story progresses and she sees the word more and realizes what it is based on the context. Or sometimes she’ll read a sentence using a wrong word, and then when it doesn’t make sense she looks back at it and finds her mistake and corrects herself. And if she doesn’t, no big deal! She’ll get it eventually–we’re not in any rush.

I’m still really amazed though, but I kind of think this is how it usually happens, is it? Maybe it takes some time for kids to figure out the basics, but once they do, woah! There’s no stopping them, and they just progress really quickly from there, as long as they have lots of interesting things to read.

I don’t really remember how I learned to read which is maybe why I’m a little astounded watching the process unfold. I was all concerned, wondering how on earth I was going to teach her something that seemed so complex. And I still don’t understand: How did she figure out how to sound out words? I mean, seriously, we never even went over what sounds the letters make! Yet she is obviously understanding something about phonics–I can tell by the way she pronounces new words. Like saying “iz land” for island.

Somewhere I read that learning to read is much less complex than learning to speak, and I suppose I wasn’t surprised that my kids learned that without 30 minute lessons and flash cards and “Now say it with me. Cat. Caaaaa tuh. Cat.” They just picked it up naturally because it was so much a part of their world, so why wouldn’t they do the same with reading, also a huge part of our lives?

Filed in: child development • family • home education | May 13, 2009